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[Side Story 2] Chapter 13.5 - Pouring rain, spashing steps.

TL Note: Again, no reading order was provided, but since it will be bundled with volume 2, I've put it after the volume.

Late June.
It's technically evening, but if you look up at the sky, you wouldn't be able to tell. Thick clouds cover everything, making it impossible to gauge the time.

Ayami: "Ughhh..."

Yep, late June, meaning it's peak rainy season.

The suspicious-looking rain clouds that appeared as I left school finally showed their true colors once I got on the train. By the time I reached my home station, everything and everyone was already drenched, worsening my mood.
But it's not just the water dripping from the sky that's dragging me down...

[ Where are you now? ]
[ When are you coming home? ]
[ You're not taking detours, are you? ]

Within just a few seconds I received these messages through LINE.
And no, they're not from a friend. Not from a boyfriend either.
Not even from someone I'm close to.

They're from my mother -- my overly controlling, toxic mom.
Ever since she divorced her second husband last year after some... well, stuff, she's gotten (to put it nicely) overly involved in my life.
The same mom who used to not even bat an eye if I didn't come home for months now won't even let me stay out overnight.

But that doesn't mean she's showering me with affection. Nope.
All she does is vent her frustrations and rant about pointless stuff, wearing me down bit by bit, every single day.

Still...

That's not the real reason why I'm sighing so much right now.
I'm not that fragile.

Honestly, compared to what I went through a couple years ago, this is relatively easy.
Back then, I was stuck in a literal hell with no one to rely on, and now I go to school every day, I've got a stable life, and even a few friends.
Life's practically a breeze by comparison.

...Well, except for one little problem. That heavenly time sandwiched between hell and now still lingers in my mind, messing me up a bit.
So no, today's gloominess isn't because of anything like that. It's just the weather.

It's the rain's fault.

And the fact that I forgot my umbrella.

Ayami: "Figures... it really was him, huh..."

It's definitely...... not because of that other thing.

Ayami: "Hey, Hikari..."
Hikari: "Hmm? What's up, Aya-chan?"
Ayami: "Your boyfriend... his name's Yuu, right?"
Hikari: "Wha-...! H-he's not my boyfriend or anything yet...!"
Ayami: "Yeah, yeah, I'm not asking for the details. Just the name."
Hikari: "Oh, but wait! Aya-chan, listen to this, something happened the other day!"

That was during lunch earlier.
The four of us were eating together, but I managed to catch a moment alone with Hikari and casually asked her. I worked up the courage and dropped the question, playing it cool.

The first clue came during Hikari's amusement park date with her childhood friend.
Our group of four friends was following along through LINE, hyping her upteasing her, when her boyfriend's real name just happened to slip out.

Hikari had always called him Ta~kun, so I never thought to ask.
It's not like I was ever that interested in other people's love stories.
No, actually, it's because I didn't have the strength to treat someone else's romantic drama as if it were my own.

That's why, even though the chances weren't exactly low, I'd completely missed it.
The not-so-funny truth that her newfound crush, her childhood friend, and the guy I left behind were one and the same.

Poor Hikari.
Twisted me.
What kind of sick joke is this, fate?

The rain picks up, falling harder and harder, showing no signs of stopping.
And, as I said earlier, I don't have an umbrella.
...Sure, I could just grab one from the convenience store right there, but even though I have the money, I don't have the energy.

Ayami: "So, to sum it up, he's always liked someone, huh?"
Hikari: "W-well, at least since before he met that Seki girl..."
Ayami: "That's a sure thing, then."
Hikari: "You don't know that! I mean, yeah, I'm his childhood friend, but I've never really paid attention to his love life until recently!"
Ayami: "Then ask Haru or Yuki about it. They'll tell you the same thing, I guarantee it."
Hikari: "But if I bring it up with those two, they'll totally tease me about it after..."
Ayami: "Oh, so you've just noticed that pattern now?"

I mean, when your friend drops the kind of over-the-top, nauseatingly sweet love story that only they could be excited about, what are you supposed to do?
You roll your eyes, smirk, act like you're too cool to care.
But even then, you've got to give a proper answer, don't you?
...Right?

Ayami: "Don't worry. The person he likes is definitely you, Hikari."
Hikari: "Aya-chan..."
Ayami: "I can guarantee it."

Yes, I'm the only one who can guarantee that.
I'm the only one who's ever heard him talk endlessly about his feelings for his childhood friend.
There's no way it could be anyone else.

99.9% certainty, it's Hikari.
The chance it's not? Not even 0.1%.

Ayami: "Well, then..."

The relentless rain keeps falling, the sky grows darker, and my motivation keeps draining away.

Ugh, this is such a pain.
It's seriously such a pain.
It's so overwhelmingly exhausting that... I'm just going to go home.

Ayami: "...Haaa~..."

The moment I step out of the station, raindrops lash against my body.
They stab into me, seep into my clothes, drench my skin, and trail down my back.

But I don't run.
I don't feel the urge to sprint home and shake off even a little of this gross, unpleasant sensation.

Honestly, if I'm not even willing to buy an umbrella, why waste the effort on something so ridiculous as running?

Ayami: "Haha..."

I just keep walking, slowly, letting the rain drench me.
No, not letting it. I'm not leaving it up to the rain.
I'm doing it on purpose, inviting the misery, choosing it for myself.

Ayami: "Ahaha... haha..."

Even though there's nothing funny, I find myself laughing.

My underwear is soaked.
My clothes are plastered to my skin.
It feels absolutely disgusting.

I remember this old movie where some lunatic danced, sang, and laughed in the rain.
I still don't understand the actor's or the director's intent.
But somehow, I laugh anyway.

Because I'm so stupid, so pathetic, so unbelievably ridiculous.

And so careless that I laugh.

Ayami: "Hahahahaha...!"

I tilt my head back like that actor in the movie, letting the rain hit my face full force. The drops sting as they stab straight into my eyes.
The rain-colored... no, the rain-soaked street isn't at all clean nor pretty.
And because of that, it feels like this is exactly where I belong.

Ayami: "You've gotta be kidding me, God."

As those words leave my lips, I can hear the sound of my teeth grinding in frustration.

............
............

I'm Sudou Ayami. Just your average, ordinary second-year high schooler.

......and for the first time in what feels like forever, I cursed the world I live in from the very depths of my soul.